Saturday, April 3, 2010
Carter Luke Vermilyea - Part 10
Carter was born on the Friday before Thanksgiving. Our church was having a big Thanksgiving banquet on Sunday night, as they always do. It is a time of sharing good food, worship, and then a time with opportunities for people to share what they are thankful for. My mom stayed with me while Ryan went to the banquet. He felt like he wanted to share with the church family about Carter. We assumed most had probably heard by now about his arm, and he wanted to share with them personally. He wanted to share with them so they would know how we were doing as a family. He wanted them to know it was okay to talk to us about it. We wanted them to know that it was okay to let their kids ask questions. We wanted them to know they could look at his arm and not feel like they were bothering us. More than anything, Ryan and I wanted them to know that we didn’t want them to ignore it and act like it didn’t happen. You see, at church that morning, no one really said anything to Ryan about it. They congratulated him on Carter’s birth, but said nothing about his arm. We were not hurt by that. He knew it was only because people didn’t know what to say, and didn’t know how we were doing emotionally. But, we also needed people to ask about it, so we could talk about it with them. We welcomed that, and that showed us people cared about Carter almost as much as we did!
While Ryan was gone to the banquet, one of the nurses came in to go over a few things with me in preparation for our heading home the next morning. When she was finished, she asked, “How are you doing with everything?” I knew she was referring to Carter and his arm. I was then able to share with her how it was hard at times, but that we also have the hope that God made him, that he is perfectly formed, and how we can trust in that. Of course, I was crying through all of that. The nurse just stared at me, as her eyes filled with tears. I was pretty sure that was such a foreign concept to her – that she had trouble understanding my faith. She said nothing else, but nodded, and left the room. God impressed upon my heart in that moment that He would use Carter’s lack of a hand to open doors for us (and later for him) to share His love with others. I cried, realizing that, only days old, Carter’s life was already being used as a testimony to the Lord.